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Except from Navigator by Kathleen Tudor from Like That Spark

She wasn't kept waiting at the shuttle long. She'd only just finished a list of pre-flight checks, thoroughly irritating the tech who'd done them already, when Cassin was practically carried into the craft and strapped in. She sighed as the two of them lifted off. Pilots were not supposed to train Navigators.

They traveled near light speed for several hours. Out of habit, Kirsa had set their course roughly for Reda, her former homeport. They would be able to travel for at least a month at current speeds without needing additional fuel or supplies. Most shuttles were designed for very long hauls, since Traveling pairs were not especially commonplace. Finally, the girl started to stir again, practically squirming in discomfort at trying to ignore the call.

 "Cassin, listen to me." The girl whimpered. "I know it's hard, but you need to listen. We're among the stars now. Can you feel it?" The girl's whimpering was rising into panic. Kirsa had spent the entire journey trying to decide what to say--how to describe something that she's only experienced from outside. "You need to embrace the stars. Embrace the ship. Throw us into the void where they sing. You can do it, it's safe." It might be safe. Or the two of them might just be flung into nothingness and lost forever. Kirsa almost, almost hoped for the latter. Death might be preferable to being bonded to the wrong Navigator. Pain flooded her as she thought of Taul.

 In the seat beside her, Cassin panted and gasped, her terror and pain radiating. Kirsa ground her teeth and let down the barriers around her mind, grunting as the panic assaulted her and she processed it, doing her best to set it aside from her true feelings. Jump, Navigator, she commanded, and with a final, terrified moan, Cassin embraced the stars. Fortunately, she remembered to hold fast to the ship as well.

 In the pilot's seat, everything went black and reality seemed to drop away. She couldn't move, couldn't speak, she could only feel. And think. She closed her eyes, or at least approximated the sensation, and allowed herself to merge with Cassin. As their minds started to slip together, Kirsa found herself in Ether. The space was haunting and terrifying. It had been so long.... She heard Cassin's voice, Am I dead? Oh, Lady, I lost control!

You're not dead. You're in Ether. You are my Navigator, and I am your Pilot.  A fierce protectiveness overcame Kirsa, the same that she had felt for Taul, though he had laughed at it, being much the stronger physically. She could sense the girl's fright still. They would be lost if her Navigator could not be taught to return them to normal space. No one had returned after more than six hours in Ether.

I don't know you. Who are you? Where am I?  Cassin was a nebulous cloud of thought, churning in her fear. She had been kept drugged and nearly entirely unaware since she had begun to show signs of the skill.

This would be easier for you if you had a form. Focus on your body. Make yourself real. As Pilot, Kirsa was not in control, and could not change things in this alien place. She could only direct her Navigator, who was slowly taking shape before her. Finally the mists coalesced into the form of a naked woman. As her own fear, tightly held, began to abate, Kirsa found herself opening even further to this frightened young woman and her feelings.

Cassin was afraid, certainly, and very confused, but slowly the fear was being washed away by the arousal that such a heightened state naturally brought. Kirsa had braced herself for the wave of desire, which was natural among Navigators while they were in Ether, but it wasn't enough. The desire that burned through the Navigator from the stars slammed into Kirsa, engulfing her and filling her until she was sure that she would drown in a sea of pure lust. It felt like hours before she could think clearly again, though Kirsa knew it had only been minutes.

This was not normal.

Cassin lay sprawled against a backdrop of stars, practically writhing with the mindless lust that had overtaken even her fear. The older woman took a mental gulp as she watched with her mind's eye. She could no longer think of the woman before her as a mere girl. This Cassin was the truth--no drugged slip of a girl, the woman before her was well proportioned with full breasts and a spread of dark hair beneath her taut stomach. Kirsa had never heard of such overwhelming desire when Traveling. Of course, she had never heard of a Navigator surviving so long after maturation without bonding a Pilot, either. If there was a 'next jump' it would be tamer.

Come on, now, you have to focus,  she told the young woman. Cassin's answering moan was of a different sort than she had made in the cockpit. This was sheer desire. The young woman was mad with it, almost lost in it. Kirsa allowed herself just a moment of panic. What the hell was she supposed to do with a Navigator incapable of even listening to her?

The woman before her seemed to provide the answer in the movements of her body. Would she listen for the promise of fulfillment?

 She dove into the younger woman's mind, deeper than she had ever gone before, and touched her thoughts to Cassin's mind. To Cassin, the sensation would be that of a hand running down her arm. Cassin, you have to listen to me. Can you feel my hand?

"Yes, I feel it. I don't understand... oh Lady!" Cassin was weeping, confused and torn.

I'm reaching out to your mind. Do you like this?  Kirsa stroked up one of Cassin's arms and down the other, her ghostly fingers trailing goose bumps.

"Yes." Cassin panted and stretched her arms up over her head, inviting.

I need you to listen to me,  Kirsa told her. She ran her phantom hands from Cassin's wrists all the way down her sides, nails scraping. With a little focus, she made the young woman feel a stir of breath at her ear as she whispered into her mind. Can you listen to me?

"I'll do whatever you want. Please, don't stop."
 Read the rest in Like That Spark.

* * * *Excerpt from Transplant by Ellen Tevault, From Up for Grabs

Katrina sighed as the man kissed her shoulder. He pressed his finger against her hole, urging it open. Once he penetrated her with three fingers, he slid his cock into her. She gasped as he filled her up. He grunted when he entered her to the hilt. She backed up to him as he withdrew, but he pounded back into her before he exited completely. Katrina grunted with the thrust. His breath hissed out as he pumped. When he came, he kissed her ear. "Oh, baby, you're going to make a beautiful woman someday." Even though he continued to kiss her, Katrina's mind closed down as the word 'someday' haunted her thoughts. After that night, she swore to never open herself up to a man again until after she had surgery.

* * * *

"We have found a transplant match for you."

Katrina's hand shook as she stared at the letter. "A match? They found me a match?" Her voice wavered. "I can't believe it. Finally, they found one." She smiled and shuffled through the papers in the envelope. Finding no picture of her match, she sighed and reread the letter.

Thinking she should tell her mother, she slipped into the few pieces of male clothing she still owned--brown trousers and a tailored shirt. She sighed as she looked into the mirror at the stranger looking back at her. She choked back tears as she scrubbed the last residue of make up from her chocolate brown face.

"Time to go, Lance," she said to her male reflection.

A couple hours later, she descended the stairs from the bus onto the streets in front of the wall, which split New Republic from Right Republic. She stared at the huge brick wall and remembered learning as a young boy about the history of the United States split into the two republics by civil war.

"See class," the teacher had said, pointing to the New Republic section of the map. "The Conservatives wanted to save us from them."

"Who's them, sir?" Lance had asked, flailing his arms as he spoke.

"Don't gesture like that. That's queer. You'll turn into one of them."

Katrina smiled at the wall decorated with rainbows, smiley faces, and other symbols of happiness as she thought about that incident, which had been her first insight into the fact that she was one of "them." As a teenage boy, she had snuck into the New Republic and met women like her. As soon as she was of age, she moved despite her mother's wishes.

"Don't you dare move over there. You'll become like them. A freak," her mother had shrieked, pacing the living room floor.

"But, mama. I don't belong here."

"Lance, you don't know what they will do to a handsome, young boy like you." She glanced to her son with tears streaming down her face and sat on the couch next to him. "I've tried to do right by you." She slapped his legs. "Don't cross your legs like a girl. Jesus, Act like a man. What is your problem?" She sobbed into her apron. "I've tried so hard."

Interrupting Katrina's memory of the last time she saw her mother, a Right Republic officer yelled from the passageway to the other side, "Hey, Are you sight seeing? Or what?" She stared at the entryway as her insides fluttered. She jumped when the bus pulled away from the drop off point with a loud hiss. She closed her eyes and returned to the memory.

"I want a female body, mama. I always have." Katrina hated the fact that her voice had a begging quality to it as she explained herself to her mother. "I've never been comfortable as a male."

"I should've locked you away when I first caught you wearing my dresses." She shook her head. "I can't believe it. I'd hoped you'd change your ways. This is nonsense, Lance. Nonsense."

"It's Katrina, mama."

"I'll never call you that. I only have one daughter." She stood and paced the living room. "I guess, now, I only have one son, too."

"Mama, please." Katrina stood and walked toward her mother.

"Freak," her mother shrieked.

Katrina ran away. Sobbing, she glanced over her shoulder, anticipating a police car to follow her. At the brick wall, she wiped her tears away on her sleeve before she searched for the opening where she'd snuck through before. She pressed against the cool wall. She bit her lip harder and harder as she touched the secure bricks. She swallowed the panic threatening to close her throat. She glanced around expecting to see prison bars surrounding her. She felt trapped. Hoping she was wrong about the spot, she stepped back and studied it for signs of repair.

"Young man?" An officer patrolling the wall shone a flashlight in her face. "Looking for something?"

Katrina jumped at the man's voice. She thought her mother had let her get away, but she had called the police after all. Her body shook as she struggled to think of a response. She stuttered an incoherent response as she turned toward the officer.

"Wanting to go somewhere?" The guard stood with his fingers looped through his belt of his brown uniform pants required of all Right Republic males. His smile told Katrina he knew.

She didn't respond and forced herself to appear natural.

The guard stepped closer to her until he breathed in her face. "Young man?" He stared into her eyes and waited for a response. When Katrina felt his hard cock press against her stomach, she nodded and noticed that his smile changed to a sneer. "Maybe we can help each other." He gazed down her body clad in the tight brown pants and long sleeved shirt, her government-issued male costume. "Understand?"

Instead of waiting for an answer, he pressed on her shoulders until she slid onto her knees before him. With trembling fingers, she undid his pants.

When his cock sprung through the open zipper, she licked her lips. She couldn't believe her response to the situation. Instead of fear, she found herself aroused. She regretted that it was so obvious pressing against the zipper of her tight pants. She wished it was more mysterious like other women. To prevent him from seeing it, Katrina wrapped her hand around his cock and guided it into her mouth. She gagged as the thick cock hit the back of her throat.

"That's it." The guard grabbed the back of her head and moved himself in and out of her mouth. He sighed as he pumped in a steady rhythm.

Katrina tried to take in a breath through her nose when he pulled out, but her mind swam from the lack of oxygen. Her eyes watered.

The officer grunted as his cock released down her throat. She swallowed the salty cream and gasped for breath, while he tucked it away and zipped up his pants. In silence, he walked her to another secret passageway to the New Republic. As she crawled through, she wondered if she'd ever be able to return again. On the other side, she felt bittersweet.

Returning to the present, Katrina realized she had been right on that last trip through that it was her last. She couldn't go back again. The New Republic was her home. She wished her mother would've accepted her, but she doubted that now would be any different. She raced to the bus stop to return home. Lance's clothes imprisoned her and she needed to escape before they strangled her.



Read the rest in Up for Grabs.